The Globetrotters

We’d gathered a remarkably huge sightseeing group on that Sunday morning in May. Wearing numbers pinned to our chests for identification and led by a pack of highly qualified Kenyan tour guides, 3,026 of us set out from Ottawa’s Confederation Square at seven o’clock sharp. Turning onto Wellington Street – the city had closed it off to traffic – our group immediately hit all the must-sees: Parliament Hill and the Peace Tower, the Supreme Court and the Library and Archives of Canada.

I was in full ooh-and-awe mode, taking in these national monuments on my first visit to Canada’s capital. But there was no time for photos. After all, this was my first marathon, and the speedy Kenyans – the perennial front-runners of the distance-running world – were widening their lead.

I’ll be honest: A 42.2-kilometre pedestrian itinerary seems like an unnecessarily hard-core approach to touring an unfamiliar city. But each year, hordes of fit, independent travellers are combining sport and vacation this way in a phenomenon known as the destination marathon. 

Shaking up a weekend getaway with a gruelling physical test takes strategy and planning. I picked Ottawa for its course: a relatively flat trail (good for first-timers) marked by all the major landmarks that might dot a Canadian history textbook; a jaunt into Quebec; a surprise cheerleading appearance by the coffee-mug-toting former prime minister Jean Chrétien standing in his Rockcliffe Park driveway; and a five-kilometre finishing kick along the gorgeous Rideau Canal. Call it a sightseeing marathon, with the epitomes of the genre being Rome and Paris, where another momentous landmark is always just around the next corner.

Last fall, I flew from my home in Paris to Dublin for my second go at the 42.2 kilometres. Running this distance on the last Monday of October in a coastal city located at roughly the same latitude as Edmonton may sound crazy. (My wife, in a driving rainstorm: “Don’t they hold one of these things in Honolulu?” For the millionth time, yes they do. It’s in December. We’ll go one day, honey, I promise.) Keep in mind, though, that the marathoner, by virtue of his single-minded pursuit of pain, has already proven himself obsessive and quite probably insane.

If Ottawa is all about the sights, bubbly Dublin is all about atmosphere. Organizers managed to attract 11,700 runners to last year’s edition of the Friendly Marathon, with more than 5,000 of us making the pilgrimage from beyond the Emerald Isle. Still, it’s puny compared to the more than 30,000 pairs of legs that stomp Michigan Avenue during Chicago’s marathon. And at Berlin, the granddaddy of monster marathons, some 40,000 runners finish through Brandenburg Gate.

But Dublin certainly passes the marathoner’s carbohydrate-loading test. From spuds prepared three ways at O’Neills pub on Suffolk Street to the hot chocolate with marshmallows at Butlers Chocolate Café, your slow-twitch muscles will be well fuelled on the big day. During my pre-race dinner of noodle soup at the ramen house Wagamama, our waitress, Niamh, found out I was racing the next morning. (It’s hard not to brag.) She was extra-sweet to me after that, returning several times with her serving tray loaded with five glasses of water – one for my wife, four for me.

To vary the pace, I’m building on the gastronomic approach with a more informal French event later this year. The big cheese is the Marathon du Médoc in the Bordeaux wine region. The race has it all: a course that passes by some 50 châteaux, with costumed runners, fireworks and your own bottle of Médoc at the finish line. While the French take their marathon training very seriously, they see race day as more of a victory lap than a final exam. So in addition to offering sports drinks and energy gels at a route’s aid stations, volunteers at the small regional contests serve chocolate, wine and cheese. Just before the end of the most decadent runs, bold participants with stomachs of steel can even suck down a fine de claire oyster or two.

Unfortunately, whatever sort of marathon you select, one thing is non-negotiable: At some point, you’re going to have to run the damn thing. Toward the end of Dublin, I repeated a Buddhist mantra cribbed from the distance-running Japanese novelist Haruki Murakami: “Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.” As I streaked past Trinity College, the cowbell-blaring Dubliners cheered me across the finish line.

Back at our B&B, I ran a hot bath and plunged my aching, salt-caked body in deep. My wife plopped down next to the bathtub with two cardboard boxes of deep-fried cod and potatoes from the local takeout. I leaned over the edge and devoured one of the most primal, satisfying meals of my life.

After my nap, my wife propped me up on a barstool down the street for several pints of Guinness. It wasn’t the best thing for my recovery, but I didn’t care. After all, the first marathoner, the messenger Pheidippides, collapsed and died after his 39-kilometre sprint from Marathon to Athens in the year 490 BC. I, on the other hand, was still alive. And I was on vacation.  

Marathons

For international runners aching to shake a leg, there are plenty of marathons to choose from in the coming months. Here is the info you need to get ready, get set, and go!  

Ottawa May 24, ncm.ca
Médoc September 12, marathondumedoc.com
Berlin September 20, real-berlin-marathon.com
Chicago October 11, chicagomarathon.com
Dublin October 26, adidasdublinmarathon.ie
New York November 1, ingnycmarathon.com
Honolulu December 13, honolulumarathon.org
Rome March 2010, maratonadiroma.it
Paris April 11, 2010, parismarathon.com
Boston April 19, 2010, bostonmarathon.org
London April 2010, london-marathon.co.uk 

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